Understanding Self-Loving

      Self-love has been a trending concept since past few years. Everyone is talking about self-love. Even on social media we see so many posts, reels about self-love. So many influencers talk about self-love. How do you know if you really love yourself? How to define self-love? I had so many questions when I started exploring the concept of self-love.

     Is it easy to love yourself? How do I love myself more? How do I differentiate if it's self-love or something else? The first thing I realised while exploring this concept was, there is a stark difference between indulgence & self-love. Indulgence is not self-love. A lot of us feel indulgence is self-love. I gave myself a treat today & I ate a pastry. Is you treating yourself with food & things a very small part of self-love. What if I'm on diet? What if I have sugar? Then does me treating myself with a pastry count as an act of self-love? I don't feel so!!

     I believe self-love is a much more broader concept than just treating yourself or buying things for yourself. Self-love is an act of loving yourself better. Which includes so many things, like accepting yourself, taking accountability of your life, setting boundaries, taking stand, pulling yourself out of all the not working & unhealthy patterns of yourself. Learning to choose yourself & not waiting for others to choose you. Unlearning & relearning things that support your growth. 

     Loving myself is not a one time act or one event. It's learning to choose yourself everyday, to hold space for your own growth, to be gentle when the winds don't blow in the direction you want, to be there for yourself. To not to abandon yourself. To accept myself completely with all the good & all the bad I might have. To patiently work on myself & redefine myself. There is less space to play victim & self-doubt & self-sabotage & self-criticism. It's learning to replace all of this with love for yourself. I think self-love also means learning to trust yourself. To listen to your own voice, to honour your feelings, and to give yourself permission to change your mind, make mistakes and begin again. It is understanding that you don't always have to have everything figured out. Sometimes, loving yourself means resting when you are tired, walking away from what no longer feels right, saying no without guilt, asking for help when you need it, and forgiving yourself for the things you didn't know better at the time. It is giving yourself the space to be a work in progress without constantly feeling like you need to prove your worth.

     Maybe self-love is not about always feeling good about yourself or constantly choosing what feels easy. Maybe it is about choosing yourself even when things are difficult. It is about giving yourself the same patience, kindness, compassion and understanding that you so easily offer to others. It is about accepting who you are today while still having the courage to grow into who you want to become. Self-love is a journey of coming back to yourself, again and again—of reminding yourself that you are worthy, not because of what you achieve or how others see you, but simply because you are you. And perhaps, at its core, self-love is just this: To Never Give up on Yourself.

Love and Light!!